A legend tells of a French monastery known throughout Europe for the extraordinary leadership of a man known only as Brother Leo. Several monks began a pilgrimage to visit Brother Leo to learn from him. Almost immediately, they began to bicker about who should do various chores.

On the third day they met another monk going to the monastery, and he joined them. This monk never complained or shirked a duty, and whenever the others would fight over a chore, he would gracefully volunteer and do it himself. By the last day, the others were following his example, and from then on they worked together smoothly.

When they reached the monastery and asked to see Brother Leo, the man who greeted them laughed. “But our brother is among you!” And he pointed to the fellow who had joined them.

Today, many people seek leadership positions, not so much for what they can do for others but for what the position can do for them: status, connections, perks, advantages. They do service as an investment, a way to build an impressive resume.

The parable about Brother Leo teaches another model of leadership, where leaders are preoccupied with serving rather than being followed, with giving rather than getting, with doing rather than demanding. Leadership based on example, not command. This is called servant leadership.

Can you imagine how much better things would be if more politicians, educators, and business executives saw themselves as servant leaders?

Michael Josephson

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Are you always in a bad mood? Do you feel as if the world has a bone to pick with you? It’s tempting to blame other people and situations for your irritable mood. But, it’s possible that it’s really not your life but your cranky attitude towards it that is bringing on your case of crankiness.

In other words, you could actually consider the possibility that you are the one responsible for muddling up your life and making it one big, chaotic mess. Everyone has to deal with disappointments, but it’s not really the stuff that happens, but how you deal with it that really matters. In other words, you are control of the situation. You can overreact, blow things out of proportion, and believe that everything is really a big deal. Or, you can change a couple of habits, reevaluate your perspective, and make life seem a lot easier.

If you’ve got a long list of important work to be done, looking at life as if its purpose is to somehow get everything done can make anyone restless and grouchy. That’s because you’re trapped in a vicious cycle. Often, you convince yourself that your obsession with your to-do list is only temporary, and that once you get through it, you’ll be calm, relaxed, and happy. But that rarely happens.

As items are checked off, new ones replace them. If you’re constantly obsessed with getting everything done, you’ll never achieve a sense of wellbeing. Remind yourself that everything can wait and that very little in your work life truly falls under the emergency category.

In the end, nothing is more important than your own sense of happiness and inner peace. Instead of spending all your energy obsessing about what you need to do, spend time doing things you’ve always wanted to do. Hang with friends, go out with family, and do something worth your while every day. Remember, when you die, there will always be some unfinished business on your plate. And, someone else will do it for you! Don’t wait any more precious moment in your life getting bugged about pressures.

While it’s proactive to want things to work out your way as soon as possible, being impatient leads to your being easily bothered, annoyed, and irritated. Patience adds a dimension of ease and acceptance to your life. This is absolutely essential for inner peace. Becoming more patient involves forcing yourself to be in the present moment and accepting what it has to offer, even if you don’t always like it. If you are in the middle of a stressful situation, gently tell yourself to relax.

Remember that in the bigger scheme of things, what you’re experiencing right now isn’t such a big deal. If you are annoyed with someone, ask yourself if they really did it on purpose just to annoy you. Odds are, the answer will be a no. A great way to build tolerance is to practice patience for just a few minutes each day. Tell yourself that during this time, you’re not going to blow up. Once you reach a milestone, you’ll begin to see that you do have the capacity to keep your cool.